midwest journey

if I was crying

in the van, with my friend

it was for freedom

from myself and from the land

— sufjan stevens, chicago

for some reason, sufjian stevens' music go together very well with this blog. probably because sufjan is from michigan himself, and michigan is right next to illinois. this is the kind of music that almost got me to apply to colleges in illinois, like uchicago and uiuc.

last fall break, I unlocked two more states in my american journey: illinois and michigan. I went to illinois because that's where my friend's home is. we've been cooking up ideas for this trip on our philly trip since before spring break last year, but as I already have plans with friends in spring break, we pushed it back to this fall break. I didn't plan a lot of things, we mostly just let the trip unfold by itself. this was good for soul because I am an overplanner.

O. the recipe

for a fun trip, you'll need

- one friend that knows a place very well (molly for local chicago/illinois/michigan/midwest and emma for domestic us lore)

- one friend that vaguely knows a place (me)

- good drivers (definitely not me) and/or navigators

- the photographer friend (me)

- some contemporary and spicy political events happening in the background so you can look back with a point of reference (the 2024 election, driving around suburbs and discovering people's political views)

how this trip changed my pov in life

- oh no you need to have a car to do everything → but once you have a car you can literally drive anywhere and do anything

- I hate dining hall food → croissang slowly discovering the beauty of american diners

- got stuffed in chicago, deep dish pizza 8/10

- learn what your friends like and don't like (molly loves mac and cheese and is very good at spotting deers, emma loves chili, dinosaurs, medieval jesus stuff, greek salad > caesar salad, champagne building, and 80s music like simon & garfunkel, doesn't like taylor swift, both of them love calvin and hobbes, all of us love the beatles's abbey road and hiking)

- discover your friends' hidden potentials outside of the artificial classroom environment (driving in hail weather, first aid certified, etc.)

and you'll realize that different worlds can coexist as long as you love and respect one another.

I. art institute of chicago + field museum

I love edward hopper's nighthawks with a burning passion. it's the first thing you see on the door when you visit my room. I was really happy to see it in the wild at last.

I was lucky to have a group of friends with museum membership, or is an art student themselves, so I get to go into a lot of museums in philly, chicago, and new york for free (but sometimes they caught us lying about me being an art student so I have to pay). dc museums are already free. beside nighthawks, I also saw thorne miniature rooms. my favorite part of those rooms are the lighting. it's a hue of yellow that resembles both sunrises and sunsets, early morning and late afternoons. depending on your mood, you guess the former or the latter, or maybe both of them simultaneously. the timing is vague, open to interpretation. it reminds me of a film set, in particular the taste of things by trần anh hùng. I also like seeing how rooms from different places around the world and in different states have subtle differences.

also becase they're tiny, I can finally contain the whole room in a photo without stepping very far away (my camera's focal length is 18mm at least, so I can't zoom very far.) in fact, I only needed to step closer to get the view of everything.

these rooms are teeny tiny so you kind of have to kneel a bit to see them. something about the act of kneeling and lowering oneself adds a lot to the experience. it's cute.

I also saw hokusai's the great wave off kanagawa, wood's american gothic, o'keeffe's sky above clouds, monet's waterloo bridge and his water lilies collection, van gogh's self portraits and peasants drawings, and seurat's a sunday afternoon on the island of la grande jatte.

we went to the field museum the next day. I learned that emma really likes dinosaurs.

in 2 moves 9 groups went extinct!

pump pump pump pump pump it up

when you wait over a week to do laundry:

the sexiest blade I've ever seen

imagine being so rich you have a diamond tool to engrave diamond

I really like that cicada guy

II. cloud gate, millenium park, chicago river, the great lakes, and more chicago sightseeing

I've come to see the bean.

the bean looks splendid.

bean is also a name for my friend's dog, which was not directly related to this bean but it's still a funny coincidence.

we came the same day the chicago marathon was happening, so we (1) had a hell time finding parking because of road closings, (2) saw people wrapped around in advertising foil because it's cold, and (3) saw people still wearing the medal for the upcoming days. it's crazy how people still wear the medals around. I think they are dying for that omg you ran a full marathon yesterday? kinda interactions, but I'm not giving them any.

the bottom of the bean reminds me of plants' stomata and electron orbitals.
you take the man out of biochem you don't take the biochem out of the man.

like just fucking look, they have the same bends

(3,1,1)

emma's favorite building, the champagne building

III. michigan road trip!

after getting stuffed in chicago, we (actually just molly and emma) drove four hours north to michigan.

it was all fun and game until it started hailing, it got to a point where it was really bad that we couldn't see anything, so we stopped in a car park and wait around half and hour for better weather. I'm lucky to have two very experienced drivers that are my friends.

michigan's pitch black is dangerous for driving, but is very calming to the soul. it is very liminal. possibly the most liminal you can get. the weather is liminal, the time is liminal, the experience is liminal. no one is in front of you, no one is after you. we keep driving without no beginning or end. it feels like walking amidst a desert.

molly: those windmills with red blades scare the shit out of me every time

this room looks very pretty during daybreak. however, when we got there around 1am it looked very dark and creepy.

plus the mirror was on the same level of your head and right next to the door (hint: bad feng shui)
so I had to put it into the closet just to make sure no ghosts can follow me.

the toilet, aka the warmest room in the house, because it is small and has direct heating and sunlight.
it also has a power socket righ there, so I got a lot of work done in the bathroom.

emma's room

this is where we had our movie night! we watched ferris bueller's day off, and I learned where the "life moves pretty fast" quote comes from. it was the movie I needed to take a break from depressing movies I saw in french classes

IV. the art of diner

I'm slowly getting the aesthetics of american diners: neon lights, road signs decor, checkered floors, vintage menus, small town feels, and food that insulates you in cold weather and harsh winters. I was born in a big city where you see people everywhere, where houses are built wall to wall and where you will effortlessly see people. small counties in michigan are probably the polar opposite: houses are detached, you can't get anywhere without a car, it gets dark rather quickly. but everyone has to at least eat two or three meals a day, so diner is where you actually see people. as molly told me, a typical diner is where they only have six or seven people in charge of everything, and if you visit them often enough they'll probably know your orders by heart.

it took me a while to realize that my favorite movies like the end of the fucking world always feature a diner scene. this scene. I also didn't know that potatoes come in so much shapes and sizes: french fries, hash brown, cubes, etc.

I tried very hard recreating that experience at home

V. au sémaphore ton nom résonneeeee

we also did a bunch of nature stuff. we went to lake michigan, which I kept referring to as the beach. we went there twice. the first day, it was very windy. the unforgiving wind blew the sand that abraded against my skin and hurt like hell. after we're back, sand were technically everywhere, even in our ears. the second day, we saw a very pretty sunset. people were also congregating at the beach in search for the comets. people had their cameras out for long exposure. we also went hiking on the second day. everything looks splendid in daybreak.

I don't remember exactly how, but lighthouses remind me of my childhood. I know that technically you can't remember your childhood when you're only 3 or 5, but I remember fragments of what I saw on our chubby square toshiba tv back then. it was either there, or on a windows xp background, an image of a lighthouse with the yellow sunset. I kept associating that image with the lamps on the stairs in my home. seeing lighthouses make me happy, although I don't see them in real life that much, especially when I was little. that's the visual side. the musical side, this song that I listened to back in 2020 got played in french classes a few weeks ago, and whenever I see lighthouses that song just plays. it fits the sunset perfectly.

I also think about this as an expedition soundtrack, of discovering new places together.

they synchronized soon enough, cause they're roommates

- depression playgrounds!
- like playgrounds for depressed people?
- no, playgrounds built back in the great depression
- oh I see
- fun, but not safe at all

climbing up was fucking creepy, especially with all the wind and metal creaks

but I survived

the sea being an angsty teenager, or having a midlife crisis

sometimes sand can be your friend. this sand particle lands right on the spot, creating a sense of ambivalence to the photo

I try to capture moments like this in photography. it's a two people's job, both the photographer's and the model's. I often don't tell people to pose, I just tell them where to stand and wait for them to act natural. the thing I like about emma is that she is very natural, so taking photos with her is effortless. my least favorite cases are when people change what they're doing and put the V fingers up as soon as they see the camera. it ruins my fucking photos. I also take unhinged photos but it's for the phone, not the camera.

if I ever become unemployed with a chemistry degree I should probably do branding photography for liquors and outdoor clothes brands

the lighting in this one is celestial and is 100% sémaphore

VI. it started to feel like october

I discovered this song from a font. annie use your telescope. sometimes, I read backstories behind fonts, and I always find some interesting facts. this font was based on the typographer's photography student's handwriting, and it was named after her favorite song, annie use your telescope by jack mannequin. I first heard this around the same time when I was having a crush on a grad physics student. nothing came out of that romantically, but he got me really interested in physics, physical chemistry, and that ended up inspiring my creative writing in my other class, and fullbright scholarships and studying abroad.

I associate this song with the fall season, and the first line describes that perfectly. it started to feel like october. we did a lot of fall things inside the house. with vinyl recordsp playing, hot chocolate, and comic books, we just sat back and did nothing. or go on scenic drives and hiking after.

driving sometimes helps you think simpler: just look straight, and keep going

the moment I saw this photo, I knew in my heart, with utmost certainty, that this will be the cover of my guide to america II when I write that blog this summer. check my guide to america I for the lore.

I got pretty scared during my first hike because it looks steep. molly held my hand and helped me walk the first few bits of it. we joked that I'll be doing the same when she crosses the street in vietnam.

then we drove back at around 10pm from michigan to chicago and dropped me off at the airport around 2am to make it in time for my 5am flight. morning flights are tiring, but it was very nice because the plane was only 2/3 full so I felt like travelling first class despite paying only $80.

that's all for now! hope you enjoyed it. looking forward to seeing everything in summer light soon <3